I was told a joke by my very first German teacher, during my very first German class. It goes like this: There was once a German man, who went to the opera. When he found his seat, he was saddened to see that his view of the stage was blocked by a large column. Regardless, he sat in his seat, because that was the seat printed on his ticket. As the opera progressed, very few other people came to watch the performance, and many seats in the opera house were vacant. Yet, the German man remained in his seat and enjoyed the opera, from behind the column, because that was the seat printed on his ticket.

Looking back, either I missed the humor in the “joke”, or it was more of a sweeping generalization about the German people. (Considering that my first German teacher was actually a Hollander, I am going to go with the latter option.)

It’s true: the Germans are orderly, precise, rule-abiding people, if I may make a sweeping generalization. To get to the point, today I went to the movies in Freiburg for the first time. Yes, I have managed to go 2+ years without going to the movie theater. Watching movies at home is hard to beat: the popcorn is cheaper, the alcohol flows more abundantly, and the floor is not a sticky. But that is beside the point.

Row D, Seat 4

While purchasing our tickets, the cashier asked if we would like to sit in the front or the back. This is an important question because, in Germany, you are assigned seats at the movies!

When we were greeted at the snack stand with a ridiculous line, there was no need for the usual division of duties: “I’ll go find some seats while you get the snacks.” Take all the time you want, people. No stress here…no one is going to sit in my assigned seat!

I was glad to see that there were no columns in the theater…because we sat in the seats printed on our tickets!